Closer to God

I feel like getting closer to God, even though I consider myself as agnostic. I don’t pray, I don’t go to church, but I know there is something that tries to control us all. I have tried to make friends with this special “something”, but it doesn’t like me. Apart from feeling rejected, I have accepted the fact that all of us are standing alone. You try to believe in something, because you don’t believe in yourself. I think that’s the reason why certain people go to church. They just need to. Actually it doesn’t matter what you believe in. But if you believe strongly enough in God, he will exist and I don’t mean just the one God.

There are many mentalists in the world who say that anything can happen, only if you believe. Just like the mentalist I was on about in my earlier blog (the one I called magician). He was certain that he could give us luck, but after all, it was about self-belief. You were the one to make the luck happen to you. Unfortunately, he didn’t manage to trick me. I wish he had. Probably he didn’t lie to me, but I lied to myself. I thought he had answered my question with a YES, but it was the answer that I wanted to hear. And maybe I didn’t believe strongly enough in the answer.

It’s funny when a lie can sometimes put a smile on your face. That’s when you think everything is just alright.

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