Dear me

Dear Paula,

how is it going with you? Have all your plans succeeded? Is everything alright? Sorry, way too many questions at once. I guess I am ok, many ups and downs as usual. Right, so I take that your love life is a total bummer then. You don’t seem to be that lucky when it comes to love, eh? Do you still blame the mirror that you broke years ago? Or the chain letter that you didn’t forward? You really shouldn’t believe in shit like that, seriously. But it does make me sad seeing you like this. I do feel sorry for women who have never received flowers from a guy. Well this just means that you haven’t met the right one yet. Really, it’s not a big deal. You need someone who is dedicated to you and thinks of you; someone who is genuine and truthful. I know, this is easily said. But if I were you, I would stop looking as well, maybe you will be found someday, you’ll never know.
I see on last.fm that you keep listening to the song “Hurt” on repeat…what’s that all about? And the day after you would be listening to The Killers! Are you bipolar or something? You really get me worried, you weirdo. Sometimes I really can’t figure out what’s on your mind or what bothers you, because you keep quiet most of the time.
So people don’t know how angry you can get then? Well, they just don’t know you. They’ve never seen you like that, except I and your family. Come on, you’re a Cancerian, they have the tendency to express their emotions all the time. You shouldn’t keep it to yourself. I wonder why you don’t tell people what you really think and feel. You always expect them to know it or to sense it, but that’s not going to work. If you don’t talk to them, you will never know and THEY will  never know. Though, I guess that’s the way you are, but mystery doesn’t always attract people, it can make people lose interest. Just in case you think you are special. Sorry to put it this way. What I mean is when you keep everything to yourself, you will never be able to get out of yourself. And that’s your problem isn’t it? You care too much about what other people think and you don’t trust yourself enough to fight against it. That  needs to change, seriously. Otherwise people will constantly take advantage of you. Sometimes you notice that and you let them do it anyway, because you think that you can reap advantage as well. But it’s not a positive thing. I mean you can see it, you constantly get hurt, so there must be something wrong. Open your eyes, think before you do something and don’t let the heart interact with your head. I think that’s the best advice I can give.
Also don’t worry about your age. You always seem to be in such a hurry, as if you are about to die any minute. Take your time and enjoy what you do and look foward to what you are about to do. I know time goes quicker once you’re past twenty, because you are more conscious about what goes on around you. I think that’s what growing old is all about. It makes you appreciate life more than before. Weird isn’t it?
I’m going to hit the sack now. Just think about what I wrote, even though it’s hard, but you just live once and it doesn’t matter if you lose one or two friends. You have your own goals to achieve. Everyone needs to accomplish something in life. And you know what your job is.
Good luck.

Love, P

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