What a day. I felt happy and sad at the same time. I’m sure you’re going to get me wrong when I start telling you about it, but however, at least I know what I am talking about.

I have been thinking about whether it’s worth keeping your heroes or not. I’m talking about real life people (evidently those you have never met). You think you know so much about them, but in fact you don’t know more than just a single chapter of their lives. But that chapter is the reason why they have become your heroes and why they have such an immense influence on you. Ultimately that’s the reason why you admire them.
What you don’t realise is that time goes by and people change. They have suddenly found their identity, they got engaged, they are happy and they plan to have children. They even talk about wanting to watch romantic comedies with their loved ones.
In the past your hero was nothing like that. He was going through a lot of phases in his life and music and writing were the only things that kept him sane and prevented him from killing himself. He produced music not only to express and reflect himself, but also to communicate with people out there who felt exactly the same. And I felt spoken to. That’s the moment where you think you have found a soul mate, who is ultimately your hero. You felt the same pain, the same anger and cried the same amount of tears.

So what if that person has changed drastically? In a positive way?
Yes you are happy for him. He has reached the first stage of happiness. Well, you’re not just happy for him, you are envious as well, because you don’t know how far you still have to go until you get there, too. It took him about twenty years. So how far will I have to go? I’m not as intelligent and talented as him. Will it take me my entire life?
The only sad thing is that you can hardly identify yourself with his latest music. When he sings his old songs, which you love, you feel this happiness in his voice which just doesn’t seem to fit at all and he tries his best to sound as aggressive as possible. It’s the wrong mood. It becomes so wrong that the songs lose their identities.

I’m trying not to see this in such a negative way, because people change and nothing is more wonderful than changing for the better.
Still I have to say that I still love this man. For what he has created.

After all, he is my second hero. No one will ever beat John Lydon, who taught me honesty and individuality. The one who taught me to think for myself. He has made me to the person that I am now. I’ve been this way since I was 16. He hasn’t changed and he never will. If good people stay good throughout their lives, there is no need for changing anything. And he is the best example.

Some people (including Lydon) say that heroes are useless. It’s still cleverer than to allocate yourself to some religion, right? Kids tend to look up to their parents and see them as their heroes – there is nothing wrong with that. What’s more beautiful than having someone wise who can teach you about life. It gives you opportunities to explore your own mind and views. Your heroes only lead you to a roundabout and it’s up to you which way you want to choose.

I know happiness is meant for everyone at some point. Your heroes are the best examples.

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