It’s just sexual attraction

In a way that’s not really me, but moreover, if I don’t give it a try, I will never be anywhere close to who I am. Somewhere in a Bryan Adams song he says “Try everything twice” and so I will.


Recently I have no room to accommodate sleep, which is not too bad, it gives me more time to implement my life projects and rebuild an internal relationship with my music. My plans are currently coming along slowly, but in order to be able to control my impatience, I need to value all distractions that I can obtain while I am here.

I didn’t realize that one way to have fun in an environment that does not fully comply with your likes and tastes is to let your open-mindedness take the lead and simply let yourself go. Uptight and shy as I was…


Despite all the insincerity that one encounters in his life, I suppose, the only important thing is to be aware of it, but whether or not you want to change something about it is a different story. Some people are like that for a reason. And I wish I could have someone explain it to me. There is more to understand than what I already do understand. I’ve begun viewing the whole concept of insecurity within a person with the eye of someone who needs to be extra careful. The 21st century’s mind is so misted up that it cannot differentiate the heart from the head because it constantly succumbs to the lower brain where sexual attraction dominates all morals and principles, so that you forget what is wrong or right.


Like Dorian I’ve begun to embrace the concept of pleasure a little bit more. I might as well, like Johnny when he gave up on his shyness as a teenager. I thought I had done the same, but I never have. However, the awareness has done its job and thus perception has once again surpassed the concept of truth.

I think I finally got the hang of it. There are things that shouldn’t ever be revealed to you or anyone.


I’ve never craved for so much fun like I do now. I kind of regret not having spent enough time with my former cliques, but ok, I was very, VERY preoccupied with myself and the world and my acceptance issues. But I do not regret the written accomplishment that resulted from that. So I did have my preferences and you just cannot dedicate your time to more than one thing. I used to be obsessed with a shadow that once gave me shelter. And now it’s telling me to live.


When I woke up the other morning I realized that I could not afford to miss out on anything anymore. As an adult I should be able to handle multi-tasking, more importantly I need to see myself reflected in other people’s eyes. And I want to.


Throughout my life I was looking to build a serious relationship with the world and yet it was never sure about me. Now I want to coalesce, no matter whether it’s merely sexual attraction or not.

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