Sometimes I feel close to God, even though I consider myself agnostic. I don’t pray, I don’t go to church, but I know some higher power has control over us. Perhaps it’s the universe and dying stars. I have tried to make friends with this particular “something,” but it doesn’t like me. Along with feeling rejected, I’ve accepted the fact that we all stand alone. You try to believe in something because you don’t believe in yourself. I think that’s the reason why some people go to church. They need it. It doesn’t matter what you believe. But if you believe in God, he will exist for you, and I don’t mean just the one God.
Many mentalists say that anything can happen if you believe. Like the mentalist, I mentioned in my earlier blog (the one I called magician). He was confident that he could send us luck, but after all, it was about self-belief (or a hoax). You’re the one to make things happen. Luck is something outside of our control. Unfortunately, he didn’t manage to trick me. I wish he did. He probably didn’t lie to me; instead, I lied to myself. I thought he had answered Yes to my question, and it was the answer I wanted to hear. Or maybe I didn’t believe strongly enough.
It’s funny how a lie can put a smile on your face sometimes. That’s when you think everything is alright.
