If only you knew that climate change has become the equivalent of who we are in reality – a little off balance.  I haven’t quite wrapped my head around this and I never would have thought I would say this, but I admire old couples, although I’m not the most tolerant person when it comes to old age.  Still, there is something admirable about consistency, as in the concept of accepting things the way they are and not questioning them. A shame that there is only little that I accept and my questions never seem to have an end.
I like the end of things. This is why autumn is the most meaningful season that we have and currently, along with climate change, we get a lot of autumns. So does this mean we’re approaching the end of things? Or just the end of you? Funny that you don’t think about these things.
In the early morning between 5 and 6 I smell spring in the damp air, in the pink blossoms and in the evening I smell the end of the day, the smell of autumn, the smell of the end and I become calmer. I’ve figured that everything and everyone smells inexplicably bad during the day. They’re everywhere robbing your air, your space and your soul.
The only sentiment that you’re left with is ‘loss’ because deep inside you believe that we are here to create and share and you’ve realized you’ve done none of that today.
It’s cold, but the window will remain open throughout the night. I guess I need to capture autumn as much as I can, as I’m still heating up and it’s difficult to suppress that. Keep that child’s forehead cool with a wet towel. You see he’s hallucinating again.  He thinks you’re Cronos, his favourite Greek God who has arrived to give him an hourglass. Our days come in grains of sand through the hourglass.
Delirium is a nice place to be if you have no fear; you have to be awake, as fear only shows in your dreams.
I lied; I don’t like the end of things. I only pretend I do. There is a danger in looking forward to things and the danger is the fear of the transitory.
Each grain counts. And this I need to remind myself every day.

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